Conflict—it’s everywhere. Whether it’s a disagreement with a spouse, a misunderstanding at work, or a minor frustration like discovering your favorite coffee shop has run out of your go-to drink, conflict is a constant in our lives. But what if we looked at it differently? What if conflict, when approached with the right mindset, could actually become an opportunity for growth and a way to reflect Jesus to the world? Let’s explore navigating conflict with a Christ-like heart.
In our series on Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, we’re exploring how entrusting every area of our lives to Jesus can transform us into His likeness. Today, we’ll look at handling conflict in a way that honors God, cultivates peace, and strengthens our relationships.
If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. – Romans 12:18
Navigating Conflict as a Path to Growth
Conflict exists because tension exists, and tension is simply part of life. From workplace decisions to family dynamics, tension is everywhere. But it’s not inherently bad. In fact, the Bible reveals that God often uses tension and conflict as tools for growth. James 1:2-4 tells us, “Consider it pure joy whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” When we handle conflict correctly, it can strengthen our endurance, deepen our faith, and make us more complete in Christ.
Key Characteristics of Navigating Conflict Like Jesus
To approach conflict with a Christ-like heart, there are a few key traits we need to embody. Humility, clear communication, and loving-kindness are essential. By embracing these characteristics, we can reflect Jesus to those around us and bring glory to God, even in difficult situations.
Steps to Navigating Conflict in a Christ-Like Way
1. Ascend: Gain God’s Perspective
The first step in handling any conflict is to seek God’s perspective. Before jumping into a discussion or reacting to a situation, take a moment to connect with God. This involves:
- Viewing the situation as God does: Scripture tells us that God looks at the heart rather than outward appearances (1 Samuel 16:7).
- Weighing our motives: Proverbs 16:2 reminds us that even when we think we’re in the right, God examines our motives. We might discover our own role in the conflict when we pray for clarity.
- Searching our hearts: God searches our hearts and minds to give us a fuller understanding of our actions (Jeremiah 17:10).
Take a moment to pray and ask God to reveal your true motives. Invite Him to show you how He sees the situation and where He might want you to grow.
2. Reflect: Examine Yourself
Next, turn inward. Reflecting on our own actions and attitudes is crucial in approaching conflict with humility.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” – Psalm 139:23-24
By examining our own actions and attitudes, we gain a clearer understanding of how we might have contributed to the situation. Make a list of areas where you need to repent or ask for forgiveness. This step prepares your heart to approach the other person with honesty and humility.
3. Connect: Engage with Humility
Now, it’s time to address the conflict directly, but with humility. Approach the person involved with a genuine desire to listen and to seek reconciliation. Jesus emphasizes the importance of taking the initiative in resolving issues, saying, “If your brother or sister sins against you, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you” (Matthew 18:15).
When engaging, keep these steps in mind:
- Ask about the impact: Gently ask, “How did my actions affect you?” Listen actively and openly.
- Confess without justifying: Own your part in the conflict, admitting any wrongs without shifting blame or making excuses.
- Seek and extend forgiveness: Sincerely ask for forgiveness and, if needed, offer forgiveness as well.
Books that I Enjoyed on this Topic:
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality – Peter Scazzero
The Path of a Peacemaker – Brian Noble
(Amazon Affiliate Links)
Conclusion: Becoming Peacemakers in Our Relationships
Handling conflict in a Christ-like way isn’t just about resolving disagreements. It’s about growing in faith, cultivating humility, and ultimately reflecting Jesus to the world around us. Jesus calls us to be peacemakers (Romans 12:18), and that starts with each of us taking a step toward reconciliation.
So, what will you do this week to navigate conflict in a way that honors God? Will you take the first step to reconnect with someone you’re at odds with? Remember, when we approach conflict with humility, Jesus shines through.
Prayer for Navigating Conflict
Heavenly Father, thank You for using conflict to teach and refine us. Help us to see our challenges from Your perspective, to reflect on our actions, and to approach others with humility. Guide us to be peacemakers, honoring You in all our relationships. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.